To the Sky: Version two
Alteration of idea
Inventor is now female with a son, my reasoning is that I was trying to think of something that could be at lost when she finally fulfills her dreams, the first thing that came to mind was her son, Phil also suggested to use the house as parts for the machine. I decided to change the inventor after Phil suggested he have a wife and kids, I initially toyed with the idea of him having a daughter but that isn’t currently a relationship I fully understand. So sticking to what I know, which is a mother and son dynamic which made the gender swap more logical.
To the Sky Version 2
In a world where flying cites exist (based on georgii krutikov ideas) a land-bound inventor and her young son set out to reach one of the flying marvels. After her two person designs fail to work she decided to go down a different route. Building machine 105 a one-person jet pack based design, she finally stumbles upon a design that functions. 105 is not perfect yet and not having all the parts necessary to improve it she resorts to dismantling her own house to improve the machine . Finally, version 130 is complete but at the cost of her home but this is not a problem as she will have a new home in the sky city. She prepares for 130’s first flight with complete confidence, using a base jumpers approach to momentum and jumping of jumps a ledge. He son watches as his mother falls off a cliff to then rise up, amazed he claps, waves and smiles proudly at his mother. Now soaring in the air she forgets why he created the machine in the first place and just begins to enjoy the flight. after some acrobatics she remembers the city and begins to make her way up in hopes of making it to the city. As she flies further and further away she looks back and can no longer see her son, at this point she realizes that she left the one thing mattered most behind. She completely forgets about the city and jets back to the broken home to fix the mess she made.ending by repairing the house.
Hi Ryan - I don't want to sound like some misery-guts, but I'm not sure a happy ending is going to cut it here. And I think there's too much complication here too. The message of the film needs to be resoundingly clear. On reflection, I think the idea of a neglected child or family is going to be too brutal if the film concludes with the protagonist realising that they've broken a treasured thing in their quest to improve their status or achieve their goal. I think everything needs to get simpler and more 'universal' - so something like this?
ReplyDelete1) We meet a character who has a lovely home and is happy. His home is simple and comfy. All is well.
2) Character notices a string anchoring something in the sky - he looks up and sees another house floating high up. It looks very swanky.
3) Character is back in his house. He is thinking about the house. We are shown a short dream sequence in which he pictures himself in the floating house. He pictures himself happy. Everything is bigger and brighter up there. After his dream, we see his dissatisfaction with his own house.
4) He designs a flying machine. He uses planks from his floors and his curtains. It doesn't work.
5) He designs another flying machine. It doesn't work either.
6) Montage follows showing character trying multiple machines; we just shown him building them, not the dismantling of the house.
7) Finally, he's built the flying machine - it works, he ends up on the floating house. He's happy. Everything is great - then he looks down, and sees the mess he's made of the earth below; there is a big hole where his house was and their are tyre tracks and debris etc.
8) We see the character come to the realisation that price for living in the floating house was to high - and he's destroyed something precious to get there.
9)Next shot - character is back on the ground and he his severing the rope anchoring the floating house with a knife. He/we watch the floating house disappear into the clouds.
10) Our character - happy - walks back towards a house - re-built, if a bit wonkier than before...